Okay, I feel very truth-y today, and I need to tell you something. You may never have a six-pack. Or maybe more accurately, a visible six-pack. And I mean you could work your ass off, eat a real healthy diet, and still never get one. I mean, you might, but again, you might not. Are you mad now? Is that awful to say? However, I really do believe it. It’s like trainer blasphemy, but hey, I specialize, yo.
See, I saw this nutritionist yesterday, someone I saw a few times when I was younger, and I love her perspective. She reminded me of some things I knew but was sort of starting to lose sight of. Like that everyone is different, and responds in different ways to different things. And sometimes we spend our lives chasing the impossible, and make our happiness contingent on something that isn’t gonna be real for us. And in doing so, we sometimes miss what is right in front of us. See Dorothy? You could have gone home at any time, you just had to click your heels. Now, aren’t you pissed that Glinda didn’t tell you that in the first place and instead you had to dick around for a whole movie with wild animals and people made out of tin and flying monkeys?
So I picked the six-pack to deliver this inspiring message for two reasons: One, it is something many, many people express a desire to get, and two, I remembered something I read a while back. It was a feature on personal trainers, and one of them was a body builder. The interviewer asked what he tells people who want a six-pack. His answer? “I tell them it is exercise and genetics.”
I remember this so well because hardly anyone in the fitness field admits that genetics plays a huge role in how people look and feel and do with exercise. But it is the same answer I give people when they ask how i got my arms. “Exercise and genes.” I mean, I work out, but there’s other people who also work out equally hard and see less muscle tone.
Some people could probably have a six-pack but don’t do the exercise and nutrition stuff to find out, and hey, that’s their right and I got no truck with that. Others could have one but are doing the exercises and eating things that won’t yield them results. Others hold fat around their middle primarily, and it’s the first to come back and the last to go with any lifestyle changes. And still others might be able to see the pack, but the steps required for them to get that low body fat might be shitty for their overall health now. Some had it when they were younger and now it’s harder to see. Others have a super low body fat percentage but just don’t get very visible tone. Think of some of the skinny people you know who don’t have one. Now, you still think it is all just crunches and weight loss?
Hey, we are fucking snowflakes. we are all different. No one really believes they are going to get taller or change eye color or get a smaller nose without surgery, but we somehow think we could all have one particular kind of body if only we were better/ more disciplined/ liked exercise/ gave up sugar/ fuck me blah blah blah.
Guess who really has a six-pack? My seven-year-old, who as far as I know, does very few crunches and hardly any Pilates. Which tells us…yes, it’s probably in her genes. If she gained weight, it would likely get covered in a layer of fat, as would mine if the same thing happened. But weight loss would probably bring it out again.
But that’s not fair! Why should some people get certain genes and other people work hard but see less visible muscle to show for it? Um, yeah. I am, for example, genetically predisposed to build very visible muscle, and in the interests of total honesty, the fact that I am female and sensitive and insecure and all means sometimes I still have to work to get peace with that. This also means I have big calves, and am unable to fit into most cute pairs of boots, which I whine about constantly and maybe doesn’t sound bad until you are me, and then it bites. I’m also predisposed to hold onto weight until the end of time; and to get crow’s feet; and to have a hard time with anything plyo, even with practice; and to lose weight in my boobs first while this never happens to my sister (i.e. I’m the one who is fucked even though we are in the same gene pool); and there’s a huge strong genetic history of mental illness and alcoholism in my family, though clearly I dodged the mental illness bullet, and don’t argue with me or I will cut you. We also have lots of diabetes and cancer and osteoporosis in my family tree. I will never have skinny legs. I will never be a pro basketball player or an Olympic athlete. I could even maybe end up insane or break a hip. In short: Yes, life is a bitch. I know. Let me hold you.
Now, lord knows I am NOT saying this pack thing to discourage anyone from exercise. The truth is you probably won’t know if you can see a pack unless you give it a shot, and if that motivates you to work out and find new strengths and eat less processed food and all, I’m cheering already. But I would hope that along the way, you take a few seconds to appreciate anything and everything you get from exercise that might not be pack-related. Longevity. Strength. Endurance. Stress relief. Satisfaction and a feeling of accomplishment. Tone and fat loss in other places. Improved memory. Feeling badass. All that, and maybe even more. I believe it can happen like that. And fuck, you may have that holy grail of a pack there.
But if your quest for a pack haunts you, if you start doing the disordered eating thing, if you ignore all of the good things because you need that sixer, then please, stop kicking your ass like that. You may have been fed the lie. And I would like to tell you that some of the people I have known who have chased packs have had killer legs or great tits or eyes you could fall into or the sense of humor I aspire to or real sweet-smelling hair or brains for days or athletic talent up the wazoo… and I do sort of wonder if they even know that.
Great post. The quest for a six pack has spawned millions of dollars in risky supplements, counseling due to feelings of inadequacy and the ignorance of the fact that - as you said - “we are all snowflakes’.
Unfortunately there is a fallacy that if you do lots of situps you will get a sixpack.. nothing could be further than that truth. I wrote a blog post that talks about sixpacks and it was amazing how many people looked at that one compared to other posts that were more relevant to ‘real health’. Goes to show that we are all victims of our own environment. And unfortunately, todays environment screams ‘you are inadequate’.
Jamie Atlas
http://jamieatlas.wordpress.com
Jamie Atlas Fitness Blogger
July 29th, 2008
Whenever I feel like giving up on this whole fitness thing - um, often - your blog always kicks my ass back to work.
With a smile.
Great post.
Lisa Milton
July 30th, 2008
It’s hard to shed the desire of having someone else’s body, or a dream body as opposed to being the best YOU can be.
Right now, I am trying to grieve the fact that I do not look like pregnant Heidi Klum. It’s hard Kelly, very, very hard.
Alice
July 30th, 2008
That picture made me spew coffee down the front of my shirt.
I’m probably a case-in-point for your argument. I’m an avid runner, i train in the martial arts, and i’m around 8% body fat. No six pack.
Mike
July 30th, 2008
If a six-pack is good, isn’t a pony keg better?
Seriously, I get depressed enough thinking about all the things I want my body to do that it can’t without getting down on how it looks as well.
You know what else is really bad for you? Stress. Much worse for you than pop-tarts, if I’m reading Time magazine correctly.
MikeT
July 30th, 2008
If I had brains for days I’d gladly trade them for a six-pack.
Vanilla
July 30th, 2008
There might still be some hope on the Olympic athlete front - ask Tracy about rhythmic handball (or I can fill you in next time I see you).
Kat
July 30th, 2008
heeellllo six pack i can’t see you but i can feel you under my clingy middle fat…
juliet
July 30th, 2008
I don’t have a six pack, but my stomach rocks and I’m proud of it. I can also stay in plank for two minutes. Can six-packers do that? Probably, but please don’t tell me.
I also have giant calves! God blessed me with the ability to jump around for hours without feeling it.
High boots aren’t very comfy anywhooey.
Fit Bottomed Girls
July 30th, 2008
Another 6-pack factor: Loose skin. If I grab the loose skin on my side and stretch it out, I’ve got a lovely 6-pack!
Unfortunately, years of being over-weight (not to mention a couple of really huge babies) have turned my potential cheese-grater abs into a mere shadow of what-could-have-been.
dragonmamma/naomi w.
July 30th, 2008
I would love to have a six pack, but I would also love to be a billionaire and cure cancer and solve world hunger.
Unfortunately my body is not made to have a six pack. I have big pronounced muscles everywhere else but my abs will probably never shape up. I am ok with that.
I just want to be healthy and I don’t have to be a billionaire if I can cure cancer and solve world hunger. The key is to know your limits!
Jenn
July 30th, 2008
yeah yeah yeah, my dad’s been trying to tell me that for years. But here I am with 6 pack ab routines on my ipod, pumping iron like a dude. All I want is a line! I’m in that annoying-no-flab-but-kinda-bloated-looking-baby-belly-in-between stomach. It’s pretty aggravating.
Put down the donut. Pick up the free weight. Repeat.
Runner Girl
July 30th, 2008
You are so cool!!
Tony K
July 30th, 2008
You cheer me up - I’m lucky to be able to get a, well, a 4-pack generally, but it’s difficult to find and easy to lose and having found it once I now beat myself up something rotten for losing it again. Maybe it’s not *such* a big deal… ;p
S x
Sarah Adams
July 30th, 2008
I too am blessed with thick calves (thanks Dad!) which I whine about every winter when I want cute boots.
I have accepted that I’m not going to see a six-pack anytime really but I’m happy that my abs are rock hard anyway. My stomach is flat as a board but alas, that six-pack is elusive. I’m still not going to stop those crunches though!
I love your blog btw - it’s one of my 4 go-to fitness blogs because you tell it how it is.
Gemfit
July 31st, 2008
I walk around at a not fat 205. I diet down to 187 for competition. Never had a six pack. Never will.
James
July 31st, 2008
I love it when the big-calve thing comes along… I feel a bit more normal here
no six pack, no cute winter boots, 5′4, 16.5in-calves and all…
Angie
July 31st, 2008
great post as usual!
great reminder and you wrote that just for me right?
surf mom
July 31st, 2008
Excellent post. I have a great six-pack, I can feel it if I press hard enough. No one is ever going to see it though–I’m one of those people who collects fat around the middle. Which, by the way, I’m tired of the media telling me is going to kill me: what exactly am I supposed to DO about it, besides eat right and be active, which I am already doing?
I wish every trainer and fitness professional had your attitude. It’s so much better to be the best one can be, instead of trying to be what someone else can be.
Did that make sense? You know what I mean.
Marla
July 31st, 2008
De-lurking to compliment the hilarity and the honesty in this post. You know what really sucks? I have exactly four inches between my bottom rib and the top of my pelvis. That’s it! I’m a genetic mutant short-waisted freak who will never have a six pack. But I have super long legs and that makes it okay.
It took me a long time to figure all this out and change my perspective. And funny enough it took a personal trainer telling me that one probably wasn’t in the cards for me.
Thank you for your honesty. I love it!
ErinSlick
August 1st, 2008
I thought you were going to stop doing that freaky thing where you get inside my head and know exactly what I am thinking (and sometimes how I am loathing).
Ettamommy
August 1st, 2008
My goal has just been to be healthy and fit. I never expected to have a six-pack, but I do as a byproduct of it all, not the goal. I run and do martial arts, as part of an over all program.
Dr. J
August 2nd, 2008
Thank you Kelly for telling it like it is.
leslielou
August 4th, 2008
I appreciate the underlying message that is trying to be portrayed here but can’t overlook the negative impact that comes from the viewpoint of accepting that you can’t do it.
In my experience anything is possible for anyone (barring severe physical or genetic impediment). The time frame might be different for each person and the route might be varied but anyone and everyone CAN do it.
I agree that everyone should accept what they have, what strengths they’ve been given and the attributes they possess BUT you should never just accept your weaknesses and write it off as “just the way it is”.
Good post overall and for those of you willing to accept what is and change what isn’t, then good luck to you!
Ego13
August 6th, 2008
This was a good read. Definitely the most entertaining, thought-provoking post on 6-pack abs I’ve ever read!
I’ve come close to 6-packness, but the amount of focus to get it there is more than I want to devote to a body aesthetic. Performance before prettiness.
Brandon
August 13th, 2008
Don’t forget there’s no secret to a six pack except nutrition, training and consistency… oh and for the REAL details, you’ll need to buy my $80 ebook that skims over the stuff you can get for free anyway.
Hilarious post! But true.
Marc David
August 13th, 2008
thanks for crushing my dreams and making me laugh at the same time!
Mallory
August 14th, 2008
I totally believe that genetics has a role to play….But its like everything else you got to work hard eat right…who says u cant break through gentics people have done great things…
Carlos
August 30th, 2008
Dude, you are so wrong. No matter what you do, you’ll never get a six pack?? Even if you eat and work right? Especially eat? You mean, it’s really really hard, if your genes are not helping you, but DEFINITELY NOT IMPOSSIBLE.Most of the people don’t know what is good for them in terms of food and workout, so stop making up stuff!!
Mihai
June 1st, 2009
Thank you for proving that there are some people that are realistic about these things. As a trainer I always get asked whats the quickest way to “tone” your body? I tell them the hard truth; eat well and exercise and know that your definition of toned may or may not be in your genes, but we will work hard to find out. They kind of get mad at me and some think I’m a bad trainer. I’m sure most trainers know this but maybe thats why trainers usually don’t admit this so they can bring in new clients. I don’t need those kind of clients so I will keep telling them the hard truth! Thanks for sharing even though people probably don’t want to hear it!
Leo
August 14th, 2009
I will get it,in time I will get it,eventhough nobody in my family ever had it and my genes are not helping at all,I am so motivated,that nothing can stop me.It is going to be a bumpy road and a long one too,but I will make it there and when I do I will read this again
Filip
November 16th, 2009
I know it might not be possible for everyone but it still makes me dissapointed. I have worked my ass off and ate right but I can only feel my six pack. It still makes me really dissapointed.
Heather
March 2nd, 2010
Great post, I do agree that everyone is different and we will all have different results from our weight loss and six pack pursuits. However the chance you may not have a visible six pack is no reason not to pursue a healthy lifestyle and physique.
I believe that your genetics will dictate more how your six pack muscles are arranged more than whether or not you will achieve it, some people are blessed with symmetrical abs and others are not.
Dave
June 13th, 2010